


All This Fucking Humming

by likearushtothehead



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: M/M, Sleep Deprivation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-31
Updated: 2014-05-31
Packaged: 2018-01-27 19:01:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1719317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/likearushtothehead/pseuds/likearushtothehead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jimmy is woken up night after night by someone humming. He is determined to find out who is doing it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All This Fucking Humming

**Author's Note:**

> Some bad words. Some fluff. S'all good.

It was 3:30 in the morning and Jimmy couldn't sleep. Ever since he was a child he had been a light sleeper, waking up at the slightest pitter patter of footsteps or creak of door hinges. There were nights when even the winds were too strong to let little Jimmy have any decent rest. Which, in all honestly, was particularly awful because Jimmy had an irrational fear of the dark, and the less time he spent awake and aware while it was dark out, the better.

 

 When Jimmy first moved to Downton he didn't sleep for days. The noise of the valets, coming down the stairs in those clickity clack shoes woke him. The kitchen staff, getting up before dawn to start preparing the meals woke him. The maids chattering on well past midnight most nights woke him. And most of all, the loud, booming growls and grunts of his oaf of a roommate snoring woke him.

 

 Alfred was such a heavy sleeper that one night, in the midst of one of Jimmy's sleep deprived bursts of anger, had a shoe thrown at his head and didn't even stir.

 

 The time went by and slowly Jimmy became used to some of the noises in the house. Some nights he slept through it, others he would just ignore it and roll back over to go asleep. But sometimes he'd be awoken by abnormal sounds and noises and his brain refused to let him rest until either it stopped or he found out what it was.

 

 One night, Jimmy was jolted out of his slumber by some soft mysterious humming. It was low and slow and sort of sinister sounding. It was some sort of tune that Jimmy didn't recognize. Before Jimmy had a chance to get up and find out who or what was making the noise- the song slowly came to a finish and silence once again claimed the Abbey. Until Alfred started snoring that is.

 

 For the next three nights Jimmy had woken up to the same song being hummed happily at a late hour. It annoyed Jimmy at first, that someone was randomly humming in the middle of the night with no consideration for the rest of the occupants of the wing who were trying to sleep, but soon he found it a little bit eerie.

 

 Because it was on that third night that Jimmy had gotten extremely angry by the noise waking him from a dream where he was the lead in a musical, performing in the West End, that he jumped up, flung his door open in anger and began shouting at an empty hallway. The humming continued, but it was not in the hall. Jimmy frowned, flustered and dazed, before rushing into the servant’s hall, expecting the noise to be coming from there. But the room was empty. And so were the hall and the bathroom.

 

 By the time Jimmy got back to his room the humming had stopped but Jimmy's nerves were still racing on. He was now terrified of humming.

 

 It was only the next morning that Jimmy's nerves had settled down enough that he realised that the humming must have come from one of the other bedrooms. It was the only explanation available other than Jimmy was going crazy. He mentioned it to the others at breakfast.

 

 "Whoever was humming in their room at three in the morning last night," Jimmy said, cup of tea in hand a toast held lightly in the other. "Do you mind keeping you musical talents confined to daylight hours? I couldn't sleep." He asked, not too sternly, with just the right amount of humour and charm.

 

 The girls seemed to look around to see who would speak, who would apologise to Jimmy. Mr Carson didn't look up from his paper and Mr and Mrs Bates were giving each other lovey dovey eyes. Mr Barrow looked at his plate, his cup of tea half way between the table and his mouth, unmoving. Alfred chomped on his toast and the hall boys kept silent.

 

 "I didn't hear no humming." The younger boy, Samuel piped up, the other hall boy nodding in agreement.

 

 "Nor did I." He said loudly, too loudly for the silence that had just come before it.

 

 "Me neither." Alfred chimed in, looking up at Jimmy, who in turn frowned deeply at the big goof.

 

 "Course not! I could swing a screeching cat around our room and it wouldn't wake you up, it’s like you turn into a zombie at night!" Jimmy replied, sarcastically, causing a few of the servants to stifle giggles. Alfred pouted a little at being embarrassed by Jimmy in front of Ivy, but soon Mr Carson broke it up and ordered that breakfast talk must be a bit lighter and happier.

 

 Jimmy realized Mr Carson hated him even more than he hated the notion of happiness. It was a real achievement.

 

 The subject was dropped but it still played about in Jimmy's mind. How had no one else heard it? Why did nobody own up to doing something silly like humming? Maybe now though, that the person who was doing it knows it was keeping Jimmy awake will stop it. And in the end, that was what Jimmy was aiming to achieve anyway.

 

 So when Jimmy went to bed that night, he fell asleep expecting that he would not be rudely awoken by some musical humming at God knows what hour. He dreamt of flying kites, for some reason, with the other servants and some of the occupants upstairs. But the dream was cut short as Jimmy's eyes opened widely in shock as he heard the same sad tune that he had heard for the past few nights.

 

 It was more in surprise than in annoyance that Jimmy stepped out of bed warily and made his way to his bedroom door, pressing his ear to it gently. Under no circumstances did he anticipate that the humming would continue. He'd expected the culprit would just stop- out of sheer embarrassment of Jimmy catching them, but no, whoever it was either didn't care that Jimmy was listening or was continuing to do it to spite him. But in that moment the reason didn't matter to Jimmy, he was far too furious to make any rational sense, and stormed out into the hall with balled fists and gritted teeth.

 

 He walked, stopped, paused and listened before he began walking toward the sound of the humming again. At some points, he ended up going around in circles or bumping into things as he followed with his ears not his eyes. But after a good five minutes of wondering about the wing, Jimmy had come back to the same room over and over again, and he finally concluded that the noise must have been coming from there.

 

 He was about to rush down the hall, barge in and scream blindly at the person he believed was behind the incisive humming, but the song came to a close softly and all was quite.

 

 Jimmy stood in the hallway, looking between his bedroom door and the door of the culprit. Adrenaline was still rushing through his veins, but the ending of the song had ruined his chances of catching the hummer in the act. Still, Jimmy had gotten himself all worked up and he wanted to do something to prove that this person was randomly humming stupid songs loudly at ungodly hours.

 

 The footman decided he would enter the culprit's bedroom. If they were asleep- fine, it wasn't them humming. But if they were awake and active- well then, they were about to be in serious trouble.

 

 So Jimmy turned the handle on the door and pushed it open slowly. Seeing that there was no light on in the room, his spirits dampened immediately. He stepped into the room, closed the door behind him and looked around.

 

 "Shit." Jimmy mumbled, seeing Mr Barrow's sleeping body in his bed, his back toward him and the covers ruffled around his waist and back. Jimmy sighed annoyedly, but moved closer and closer to get a look at Mr Barrow's face. If his eyes were open, Jimmy was going to jump in victory and then punch Mr Barrow in the nose for being a humming dick. He didn't want Mr Barrow to get away with this- but if the man was asleep then that was some solid evidence.

 

 Jimmy moved closer to Mr Barrow, so close that he was almost leaning over him as Mr Barrow had done when he came into Jimmy's room that night only a year ago. Jimmy shuddered at the thought, but tried to compose himself as he leaned over to see that Mr Barrow was sleeping peacefully.

 

 "Damn it." Jimmy said, pulling back quickly and retreating to the door with a long frown. "I was sure it was him!" He whispered to himself in annoyance as he opened Mr Barrow's door and let himself out.

 

 The next morning Jimmy sat at the table in the servant’s hall with a foul frown on his face, tired and thoroughly annoyed with the situation he couldn't resolve. He had been sure the humming had been coming from Mr Barrow's room, but upon inspection the under butler was unconscious. Although, Jimmy wondered what Mr Barrow would say if he ever found out that Jimmy had gone into his room late at night and leaned over his body, their faces inches away, again.

 

 Awkwardly, Jimmy gave Mr Barrow a glance, but the under butler was too busy scoffing down toast like he'd never been fed before in his life.  He was annoyed that it wasn't Mr Barrow that was doing the humming because now he had no clue as to who was humming and how to stop them.

 

 Because the sleep- or lack of- was messing about with his work. He was dropping things and yawning in front of guests and falling asleep in armchairs and with his head down on the table in the servant’s hall. He couldn't take many more nights without sleep.

 

 When Jimmy got ready for bed that night he waited for Alfred to conk out before making his way out of the room and down to the servant’s hall. Mr Barrow, Mr Moseley and Anna were sitting at the table. Mr Moseley and Anna were chatting lightly as she waited for Mr Bates to finish his duties so that they could walk home together. Mr Barrow sat at the end on the table, smoking and probably ignoring them. Jimmy took in the information before scampering back to his room and leaving the door slightly ajar, just enough for a slither of light to come through so he could see when Mr Barrow was going into his bedroom.

 

 And so Jimmy watched, sitting with his legs crossed on his bed, waiting anxiously to see when the under butler would retreat to his quarters and hopefully, start with the humming. Jimmy wanted- no, needed to catch him in the act in order to punch him and have him been taught a lesson- don't fuck up a twenty-year-old's sleeping pattern or you'll be sorry. Jimmy had every intention of making Mr Barrow sorry- the greasy, cocky, smug little bastard.

 

 It took until after one in the morning before Mr Barrow walked into his bedroom swiftly, so swiftly Jimmy nearly missed it in his sleepy daze. But he reacted immediately, standing up and walking towards Mr Barrow's door, standing in the hall awkwardly waiting for the main event. It took another fifteen minutes, but finally the humming started. Jimmy pounced, twisting the handle with lightning speed and bursting into the room.

 

 Light streamed into the room and suddenly the humming stopped. Jimmy scanned the room quickly, his eyes searching for the guilty man and caught him, lying on his bed with his back toward Jimmy once again. Jimmy let out a low growl.

 

 "Don't insult my intelligence by pretending to be asleep, Mr Barrow." Jimmy whispered turning and closing the door before pausing, and then bolting it, more so to keep Mr Barrow from running out than someone running in. Although, that would be a sticky situation, especially after what happened last time...

 

 Jimmy turned to look at Mr Barrow but the under butler was still facing away from him. It took all of Jimmy's self-restraint not to rush over and throttle him, but alas, he quietly moved forward to he was beside Mr Barrow's bed and growled down at the older man.

 

 "Mr Barrow, I know you're awake, and I know it was you who was humming- can you just look at me, you idiot!"

 

 By now Jimmy was really riled up, and his temper got the best of him as he grabbed Mr Barrow and turned him over so that they could look at one another.

 

 Mr Barrow's eyes were wide in fear and guilt, obviously ashamed at being caught purposely trying to wreck Jimmy's sleeping pattern. He jumped suddenly in the bed, pushing Jimmy away from him and sitting up against the pillows in fear, resting on his elbows and watching the annoyed footman that had stormed into his room.

 

 "Sorry, Jimmy, sorry!" Mr Barrow said, twisting his arm and turning on the light above his nightstand. "I- I can't- I didn't mean to wake you-"

 

Jimmy snarled and huffed as Mr Barrow stuttered nervously, shaking his head in disbelief as the under butler tried to get himself out of trouble once again.

 

 "Come off it." Jimmy snapped, still standing above Mr Barrow's bed, shifting his weigh from foot to foot in anger. "You were doing this to irritate me- to... to punish me, for not... not having the same feelings for you." Mr Barrow scoffed and shook his head. "No, I mean it; this is my punishment, right? You're trying to torture me with my sleep desperation! How did you know I suffer from it? When you came into my room that night? I didn't even hear you come in... Until you... until I... Shit." Jimmy put his head in his hands and remembered the sleeping tablets he took that night. If he hadn't of woken up, god knows what Mr Barrow would have done to him...

 Jimmy shuddered.

 

 "I didn't know!" Mr Barrow cried, kicking his covers off him and standing in front of Jimmy. "I'm sorry, I am. I didn't mean to wake you up but I do have a good explanation. And no, it wasn't to hurt you or annoy you. I didn't mean to wake you. I'm sorry. This isn't punishment, James. I would never punish you for not loving me." Mr Barrow finished his speech, head hung in sadness and his eyes filled with regret.

 

 Jimmy stood, watching Mr Barrow awkwardly and trying to figure out what to say next. The lack of sleep was getting to him and his emotions were muddled and undoubtedly heightened. So he pouted like a child and shoved Mr Barrow lightly.

 

 Mr Barrow fell back onto the bed in surprise and looked up at Jimmy, swaying on his feet with his eyes threatening to shut.

 

 "Mr Barrow, for the love of god, could you just tell me what the hell you are doing humming in the middle of the night, if not to get on my nerves?" Jimmy asked, tired and worn. He blinked profusely, begging his eyes to stay open and not to forfeit into unconscious. But his legs were getting heavy and he felt his energy drop. He was going to pass out.

 

 "Jimmy? Shit, Jimmy, c'mon." Mr Barrow muttered lowly, grabbing Jimmy under the arms and directing him onto the bed. The young footman didn't fight him; he simply plopped down on the bed and curled up, willing the dizziness in his head to calm down.

 

 Thomas frowned, going around the other side of the bed and getting in beside Jimmy. He quickly turned the light beside him back off and pulled the covers up to his stomach. He lay on his side, facing Jimmy, while the blonde boy lay on his back but turned his head to keep eye contact with Mr Barrow- to keep an eye out for any signs that he thought this whole scenario was something more... that didn't matter though, Jimmy knew Mr Barrow wouldn't touch him against his will, he just wanted to give Mr Barrow a subtle reminder. They were, after all, in his bed together. It was getting more scandalous by the minute.

 

 After a while, Jimmy's head cleared and he decided that he needed just a few more minutes of rest before he could stand up. He was dying to get some decent sleep in, he'd do anything.

 

 "Thomas." Jimmy said slowly, pulling the covers up and tucking them under his chin in slight bashfulness, fluttering his eyes and yawning sleepily. Mr Barrow rested his head on his hand with his elbow on the pillow, face just above Jimmy's.

 

 "Yes?" Mr Barrow whispered, desperately wanting to rub Jimmy's side or brush the hair away from his face and even pull him close and hold him in his arms.

 

 "Tell me. Why you're humming at night." Jimmy said in a quiet, awkward tone. He was very aware that he was in bed with a man. They were best friends. It was okay. Not boyfriends- best friends. That's not illegal or disgusting.

 

 Please God, don't let anyone wake up. If anyone saw this... they'd both be finished.

 

 Mr Barrow seemed to be torn wither to tell Jimmy what he was thinking or not. He frowned down at Jimmy, wondering or not if he should tell him ridiculous lies that will shut him up or tell him... the truth.

 

 The perks of the truth would be that he'd keep Jimmy in his bed for an extended period of time and possibly have the chance to brush accidentally against Jimmy's body. The downfall of telling Jimmy was that he'd think he was weak and probably tell him to man up before leaving Mr Barrow's bed and his room entirely.

 

 Mr Barrow sighed, knowing he'd have terrible trouble lying to the man he was in love with while he lay in bed with him for the first time. Jimmy stared sheepishly at Mr Barrow's face, waiting for the ex-soldier to speak while trying not to fall asleep- Mr Barrow's bed was much more comfy than his own and the warmth of another person's body beside him in the bed made him feel safe and snug.

 

 "If... if I tell you, you won't laugh." Mr Barrow said sternly, though it sounded like a question to Jimmy. In any case Jimmy just nodded his head quickly and Mr Barrow rubbed his hand through his hair and sighed, giving in.

 

 "Okay then..." Mr Barrow leaned down a bit and got comfy against the pillows, so he was face-to-face with the footman. "It started when I was younger, about five years old. I used to have these... dreams. Nightmares, more like- where I was... I was in my house, alone, and this man came to take me away from my family..." Jimmy watched, open-mouthed, trying to imagine Mr Barrow as a child. Or, more importantly, a scared child. Fear was an emotion Jimmy thought Mr Barrow just didn't have and no he realized he was mistaken.

 

 "Go on." Jimmy whispered, for some reason drawn in by the anecdote, like it was his bed time story. Mr Barrow nodded.

 

 "It was my brother who'd told me that if I was bad than the buggy man was going to take me from me bed- my brother said that the man would take me away and I'd never see my family again. That he was going to kill me with a knife and chop me up in little pieces-" Mr Barrow muttered, but Jimmy interrupted.

 

 "What? He told you that when you were five? What kind of brother does that?" Jimmy growled, finding himself annoyed for some reason. Mr Barrow just shrugged at Jimmy, but when he looked down and realized that his love wanted an actual answer, he gave a quick reply.

 

 "He wasn't that bad. He was eight, I was five. We fought, as brothers do. He told me that so I wouldn't take his stuff. The bad man would kill me if I did." Jimmy made a disgusted face, before realising something.

 

 "Okay, that's terrible and all but, where does the humming come into it?" Jimmy asked curiously, watching as Mr Barrow smiled slightly, wistfully thinking about something as he looked blankly at the wall, his mind taking him back to his childhood.

 

 "When I'd have nightmares about that buggy man, my mum would lie in bed with me- like we are -and stroke my hair-" Mr Barrow very slowly and very tentatively reached out to touch Jimmy's hair, just stopping short to get some consent from Jimmy. Jimmy reacted by nuzzling his head up so that the top of his head fit into Mr Barrow's hand, happy to have his hair stroked in his dreamy daze.

 

 "And she'd tell me she loves me- and kiss me on the head, and tell me to sleep- and then she'd sing the song until I went back to sleep in her arms."

 

 Jimmy's eyes were closed, so close to sleep that he could feel himself dipping in and out of consciousness. His body feeling fully relaxed and ready to rest.

 

 "Song?" Jimmy mumbled, eyes still closed and lips pouting. "But... you hum." He finished, confusedly.

 

 "Huh? Oh, yes. Yes I do. Y'see, she could sing and I can't sing for peanuts so... I just hum the words." Mr Barrow explained, and Jimmy nodded his head slightly, liking the feeling of Mr Barrow touching his hear so gently and carefully, as if he didn't want to hurt Jimmy- so the touches he gave the younger boy were feather-light.

 

 "Sing it to me." Jimmy ordered weakly, in the final stages of falling asleep. Mr Barrow's heart was doing backflips, he was about to see the handsome boy fall asleep for the first time- and he never thought Jimmy could look so cute and cuddly.

 

 "But I can't sing, lovely." Mr Barrow cooed, knowing very well he was pushing his look calling Jimmy 'lovely', but it seemed like the only chance he would ever get to do so.

 

 "Please, Tommy..."

 

 Mr Barrow bit his lip harshly, never before hearing the nickname come out of the younger boy's mouth before. If it had been anyone else who had called him that, Mr Barrow reckoned he would have knocked them out. However, when it spilled out of Jimmy's pleading lips... It was insanely hot. Mr Barrow's mind went into over-drive for a second, thinking of all the different situations that could cause Jimmy to say that to him... Before he realised the boy was waiting.

 

 "Fine, okay...

 

 All I want to do is write a song

 One I haven't ever sung before

 I don't want to sing the same old thing

 It wouldn't mean anything to me...

 

 All I want to do is write a song

 But everything I say just comes out wrong.

 I guess I'll just throw my thoughts away

 Maybe pick them up another day...

 

 I just lost control.

 I just wanted you to know,

 When I'm on my own

 I feel invisible...

 And I just lost control.

 I just needed you to know,

 When in front of you

 I feel invincible

 

 I want to write a song that makes you smile.

 One that keeps you around for a while.

 I wish for small things- like losing this feeling.

 I've seen this coming; I've seen you leaving...

 

 I just lost control.

 I just wanted you to know,

 When I'm on my own

 I feel invisible.

 And I just lost control.

 I just needed you to know,

 When in front of you

 I feel invincible.”

 Jimmy wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry at how amazing the last few moments were to him. Mr Barrow had sung him a love song. It took nearly all of Jimmy's strength to react, simply because he was so close to sleep.

 

 "Mm... Good. Good, Tommy..." He mumbled, causing Mr Barrow to chuckle lightly, moving slightly closer to Jimmy so that he could lie on the bed on his back to sleep. Jimmy didn't seem to mind and cuddled up to Mr Barrow's side, eventually resting his head on Mr Barrow's chest and his arm hanging loosely around the under-butler's waist.

 

 What a turn of events, Mr Barrow thought, shocked at the whole situation. Jimmy mumbled a few words into Mr Barrow's t-shirt, lips brushing the older man's chest over the thin cotton. Mr Barrow shivered.

 

 "S'nice. But why've you been singing it at night?" Jimmy asked, ready to fall into his dreams at any moment. Mr Barrow just rubbed Jimmy's hair and hoped he'd fall asleep before he got the chance to answer. Unfortunately, when Jimmy received no reply, he began to whine like a child until Mr Barrow had to give him the answer.

 

 "Because, to this day it still helps me sleep... And I've lost a lot of sleep recently worrying about... about you." Mr Barrow replied, his voice soft and light. He was praying Jimmy would just fall asleep soon. The poor boy needed it more than anything. However, Jimmy seemed to be trying his best to keep up with the story.

 

 "Me?" he asked groggily, sounding a bit taken aback.

 

 "Hmm." Mr Barrow said moving his other hand up to trace patterns lazily on Jimmy's back, smiling down at the tired boy. "Sometimes I still have bad dreams... Ones where... You leave me, or you... You try to throw me in jail. Or that you just really hate me- and I can't take it. “Mr Barrow paused to laugh slightly just to relieve some tension. Jimmy didn't laugh along. "And I sing the song to help me back to sleep. That's all." Mr Barrow finished, watching the ceiling and hoping Jimmy was not going to answer him.

 

 "I wouldn't hurt you." Jimmy simply replied, hand spaced across Mr Barrow's chest, rubbing in slow circles. Jimmy yawned. "Never." he mumbled.

 

 "I know." Mr Barrow replied, truthfully. "I know you wouldn't, my love."

 

 It was at the stage in his slumber that Jimmy realised something that made him grin into Mr Barrow's t-shirt. “So, if I'm here with you, protecting you from bad dreams, does that mean you'll go asleep? With no singing?" Jimmy asked hopefully, his wide eyes turning to look into Mr Barrow's. The older man pulled back in shock, trying to determine if Jimmy was joking with him or not. Apparently, he wasn't.

 

 "You what?" Mr Barrow countered, "You want to sleep in my bed, with me?" he asked, his mind thinking a million things at once. Jimmy wanted him, needed to be near him, wanted to protect him, care for him-

 

 "Well, yeah, I need to sleep. Doesn't really matter where as long as you keep your mouth shut."

 

 Mr Barrow's high hopes fell to the ground with a splatter. Of course, Jimmy couldn't care for him like that- and Mr Barrow wouldn't ever ask for that of him. But still, he had dreams... Dreams of him and his love, being happy together, free and safe from scrutiny and judgement- where he could love and provide for Jimmy forever...

 

 "And, well, I don't much like the thought of you being kept awake all night worrying about me when I'm, what, ten feet away? Surely I can just sleep here... Silently."

 

 And a small light of hope flashed through Mr Barrow's mind. With a grin, Mr Barrow fixed the covers over the both of them, making sure Jimmy was warm and snug. Then, he very slowly and very hesitantly leaned his head down and pressed his lips softly to Jimmy's forehead, tucking him in with a kiss.

 "Ah, Tommy." Jimmy whined, eyes still closed and nose scrunched up, annoyed to be fussed over this close to falling asleep. Mr Barrow laughed lightly, knowing that the kiss was well received in comparison to the last one. It only gets better from here, he thought wistfully.

 Jimmy fell asleep not long after that, with Mr Barrow lying silently beside him watching him in sheer happiness. And for the first time in nearly a week, Jimmy woke up the next morning utterly delighted that his slumber was not interrupted due to some humming idiot. Instead, he woke up to his tummy being rubbed and his face being peppered by sweet -but not entirely unwelcomed- kisses. And when he opened his eyes and looked at Mr Barrow's smiling face, he couldn't remember a having a better night's sleep than he did, that night.


End file.
